Don’t Let Financial Hardships Ruin Your Marriage
Holding together a marriage is no easy feat, and many couples face the same kinds of problems across the board. It’s not easy to devote your life to another person and a lot of times, married couples fall into routines whereby they take each other for granted, hide bad feelings instead of talking about them, and basically create distance when it would be so easy to come together. But the worst problems that many marriages face by far are financial. When it comes to sharing assets and acting responsibly where money is concerned, some spouses just can’t seem to get it together. But you can’t allow financial difficulties to destroy your marriage. So here are a few ways to get your finances, and your marriage, in order.
- Form a budget. Overcoming any financial trouble starts with forming a budget. This means checking your income against your expenses in order to see where you’re going astray. Creating a budget that allows you to live within your means will help you to get spending in check, pay down debt, and curb the financial arguments that have plagued your marriage (as long as you both stick with it).
- Consolidate debt. When people get into financial trouble, they often find themselves in debt with various creditors, from lending agents (like banks) to credit card companies. By shredding credit cards and consolidating debt to one low-interest loan, you have the opportunity to lower your monthly payments and reduce your overall debt, which will allow you to pay your debt down more quickly (especially if you’re not adding to it).
- Consider banking options. Problems can arise when two people with very different spending habits throw all their earnings into one pot (a joint banking account). Even though both parties may have done well enough on their own, blending money can lead to issues when one hand doesn’t know what the other is doing. Although online banking has made it easier than ever to check your balance in order to avoid overspending, one partner might know the money in the account is for an automatic withdrawal while the other thinks it’s okay to go on a shopping spree at Bloomingdale’s. You may be better off keeping separate bank accounts and splitting the bills, with each party responsible for what they can handle with their earnings. Every independent adult needs to feel like they have control over their own money and this may be the only way to get it and to keep both partiesaccountable.
- Meet with a financial planner. If you’ve tried to fix your finances on your own with little success, perhaps it’s time to consult a professional. A financial planner can not only set you up with a budget and help you to manage your debt; he can also give you the tips you need to go it alone in the future.
- Marriage counseling. Serious arguments about your finances may seem fairly self-explanatory on the surface, but it could be that there’s something more going on. So in addition to getting some help with financial planning, you may want to see a marriage counselor. This way you can deal with both your financial issues and any other problems (communication, for example) that could be exacerbating the situation.